


Broken Mirror

by SleepsWithCoyotes



Category: Kingdom Hearts, Loveless
Genre: Crossover, M/M, Requited Love, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-11
Updated: 2017-04-11
Packaged: 2018-10-17 14:07:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10595577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SleepsWithCoyotes/pseuds/SleepsWithCoyotes
Summary: Their luck is running just about average.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Archiving old fics from 2013. Loveless xover challenge from ticktocktober, who requested Axel + Riku.

He didn't know why he was so surprised. Roxas could kick his ass six ways from Sunday when the kid put his mind to it, so he'd already had it pointed out that age wasn't everything. It shouldn't have been such a shock to find himself flat on his back halfway through a fight, Riku straddling his chest with that creepy fucking sword laid across his throat, some kind of... _charge_ zinging through the both of them, like nothing he'd ever felt. It didn't look like Riku was immune, either; the kid looked like someone had goosed him, only Riku was kneeling on Axel's wrists, and Axel wasn't that crazy.

And then Riku was cursing, tearing at the fastenings of Axel's coat one-handed like he meant to--

"Whoa, hey, red light, kid, _red light--"_

\--and sitting back gracelessly on Axel's stomach once he got a good look at the tattoo over Axel's heart.

"Oof," he said, glaring up at Riku, who ignored him. Figured.

"Fuck," Riku said abruptly, with a weird little laugh that made Axel tense under him. "And here I was worried it'd be the replica. Should've known it was just more of the same bad luck."

"Uh...you want to try that again without the cryptic bullshit? I can talk to Xemnas anytime."

Riku's hand fisted on his own collar then, tugging his shirt and stolen coat down just far enough that every urge to ask for dinner and a movie first died unspoken in Axel's suddenly-dry mouth.

"Broken. Fucking. Mirror," Riku ground out bitterly as Axel stared, head swimming in disbelief. He knew that symbol--the oval picked out in two woven strands, the lightning-bolt crack down the center--familiar as his own skin. "So I guess that makes you my Fighter."

Axel started, and though he hadn't thought his eyes could get any bigger, he was getting used to being wrong. "No fucking way."

He'd actually liked Riku's smirk the first few times he'd seen it, but now it just made him want to punch someone in the face. Three guesses who, and the first two didn't count.

"What? You were hoping for Roxas, maybe?"

Yeah, he felt that one, and fuck the myth that Nobodies didn't have anything to feel _with._ It made him angry, made him sneer right back, and it was _better_ than a left hook when he shot back: "No more than you've been panting after Sora."

He knew he'd scored a hit--it was right there in Riku's eyes--but the kid took it without flinching, snarl fading into a crooked little smile.

"You don't get it, do you?" Riku said slowly, and though Axel was pretty sure he could have thrown the kid off in that moment, something kept him right where he was. Waiting. _Listening._ "Roxas already has a Fighter, and Sora's already got a Sacrifice."

No. No way.

"They're _Kingdom,_ idiot. You're never going to get between that."

"That's...not possible."

Riku snorted, his face already back under control though his eyes were still giving him away. "Maybe not before he split himself in two," Riku said dryly, "but it's too late to change it now."

"Fuck."

It suddenly didn't seem worth it to fight, but the moment he went limp, Riku was up on his feet, backing away like he'd just lost interest, just like that.

"Look," Riku said, watching impassively as Axel sat up on his elbows with a wince as bruised muscles pulled taut. "You know they're going to come together eventually. It's what they are. Just don't get in my way if I have to hurry things along. All right?"

"What?" Axel scoffed, feeling his insides yawn open as wide and empty as they had that first day he woke up heartless, nothing but flesh and memory and too much stubborn to lie down. "You're not going to order me?"

Riku eyed him coolly, saying, "Why would I do that?"

He didn't know why that was a surprise either, why he felt so _alone_ as he watched the kid open a dark portal with the ease of a pro, slipping through and away without once looking back.

***

The thing was, he didn't need a Sacrifice. He'd never had one before, and he'd always done just fine on his own. That was one of the few perks of being a Nobody: he should have been setting off mental alarms every time he got too close to another fighting pair, but it wasn't just the ordinary folks who looked right past him unless he made himself visible. For a Fighter, he was practically a ghost, and wouldn't _that_ have guaranteed a few sleepless nights once upon a time?

So yeah. He didn't need a Sacrifice. And Riku clearly didn't need a Fighter, not with that much darkness at his beck and call, not when the little shit could have been a Keyblade master himself. There was still a chance Riku might end up filling those shoes if anything ever happened to Roxas or Sora, and that...wasn't something either of them wanted. They might even have bonded over it if they weren't completely fucking Luckless.

Instead it was business as usual, and in that he was perfectly fine with following his Sacrifice's lead. Who ever heard of a fighting pair who couldn't stand the sight of each other, anyway? It wasn't like Riku had ever tried to pull him into a battle-- _You never call,_ he grinned to himself, _you never write_ \--so it wasn't like their bond was all that strong anyway. Small mercies, he guessed.

It wasn't until the day he found himself keeling over from the sheer force of _need_ tearing through the center of his non-existent heart that it occurred to him that acknowledging each other might have changed all the rules, that there were always new ways for his luck to run out. He didn't know what Riku had tangled with, but even from this distance, he could tell the kid was losing, that he was digging for every scrap of strength and will inside himself just to make it out in one piece. It was a bit like having a heart again, like laughing with Roxas and feeling _this close_ to human for a little while, and for one instant he forgot that this wasn't his friend, that they weren't ever going to _be_ friends. He just wanted to answer that call, to be the one thing that was needed, to feel vicariously whole again.

He felt it the moment Riku realized what he'd touched, the wordless shock, like that ragged little bond was the last thing he'd expected to find inside himself. Recognition hit next, a knee-jerk dismay that could have been Axel's own, but the rest--determination, stubbornness, blind resolve--that was his Sacrifice digging in his heels.

Before Axel could make up his mind to stay or to go, the darkness rose up between them like the slamming of a door, all sense of _Riku_ winking out like a snuffed candle on the other side of that wall.

When he came back to himself, laid out on the corner of Fifth and Nowhere, there was a Shadow leaning over him and peering into his face, its crooked antennae jerking in alarm as he sat up with a groan. "Too late, moron," he muttered as the Shadow dove back into the asphalt, careening off down the empty streets of the World That Never Was like it thought Axel was going to chase it.

To quote Xigbar, as _if._

He didn't know why he was angry. So Riku didn't want his Fighter's help--was that supposed to hurt his feelings? And was that supposed to be a joke? If the kid didn't know when to swallow his pride and ask for a hand when he was in over his head, that wasn't Axel's problem. And if he was stupid enough to lose himself to the darkness a second time, at least he'd be out of Axel's hair until he straightened himself out again.

Of course, that was before he got back to base, found out that Riku had been _here,_ maybe half a mile away, and hadn't been alone. "They got Roxas," was the first thing out of Demyx's mouth when Axel walked in, the _first fucking thing,_ and he just...what was he even supposed to do with that? He could have _been there._

Could have fought. Been ordered to fight. Ordered _not_ to fight. Knowing his luck, he could have fucked things up beyond all recognition, though for _whom_ was the real question. And what the fuck had Riku been thinking? Really, what the _fuck?_

There was bile in his throat and a furious tremor in his hands until he fisted them still, and no matter what reasons he came up with for being cut out of the action like that, they all settled in his stomach like stones. Pity just didn't seem like Riku's style, and there was no way he'd waste any sympathy on a Fighter torn two ways, not when he could probably guess which way Axel would jump. Cold calculation was a definite possibility, only Axel knew better, didn't he?

Riku hadn't been expecting him, hadn't planned for him or around him. Riku hadn't been thinking about him at all.

Apparently neither had Roxas.

It should have worried him more--wherever they'd gone, they hadn't left a trace--but he knew Roxas. Knew _Riku,_ who might want to make Roxas disappear, but only if he woke up as Sora. Wherever they were, they were probably fine. And it wasn't like Riku could hide from him forever.

Sure enough, whatever had had Riku hitting the panic button like that in the first place--getting his ass handed to him by Roxas, no doubt, and that probably shouldn't make Axel as happy as it did--it couldn't have been too bad. A few hours later the connection between them came back online, more frayed than before but with a real live boy on the other end. Not that he'd expected anything else. The kid was like a cockroach; he just kept coming back for more.

So now he had a direction: find his Sacrifice, and he'd find Roxas. He even had something like a plan, which was to avoid finding out the hard way whether he was weak to orders or not. He didn't think for one moment that Riku would go easy on him, not where Sora was concerned.

That was fine by him, though. The feeling was entirely mutual.

***

When he finally caught up with his Sacrifice again, a week later and some disturbing rumors the wiser, Axel nearly didn't recognize him. Pulled to some backwater calling itself Twilight Town, he'd been walking the streets of an overgrown suburb playing at being a city when he spotted a patch of deeper darkness in the shadows of a train station: someone in an Organization coat, only with the hood pulled up so he couldn't tell at first glance who it was. Too big for Demyx and way too slight to be Xaldin, he wasn't ragged enough to be Xigbar, either. Luxord wouldn't have been able to keep his hands still--he'd have been fidgeting with a deck or walking a set of dice across his knuckles by now--and Saïx wouldn't have been hooded in the first place.

"Superior?" he asked warily, trying to remember if there were orders he'd been blowing off while he hunted down his wayward Sacrifice and missing friend.

"Close," a deep voice replied with a mirthless snort, gloved hands lifting to pull back the hood.

Axel stared, his stomach icing over slowly. He could feel his Sacrifice, so close their fraying bond was all but humming, but the eyes staring coolly back at him were Heartless gold. They _were_ the eyes of a Heartless--Xemnas' Heartless, the one that had gone around calling itself Ansem for the pure sake of stirring up trouble, near as Axel could figure it, since that wasn't _either_ of their names, and that meant--

"Riku," he said, his own voice echoing through a static of guilt buzzing in his head, though he couldn't for the life of him have said why.

Nearly a foot taller, a hand broader in the shoulders, a decade older and dark-skinned and-- _Heartless._ It didn't look a thing like his Sacrifice, but Axel would have known Riku anywhere.

By the infuriating smirk that twitched across Riku's new face if nothing else.

"Good guess," Riku said, and Axel felt the same anger of a week ago flaring up again when it had all but faded into close-held memory.

"Right, because they're just _lining up_ across the worlds to be possessed by _that_ guy." Guess? Riku called it a _guess? Really?_

"You never know," Riku said, his face a rock though his eyes were bleeding bitterness. "He could have found a way to come back." _Again,_ he didn't quite say, and what the fuck had Axel _missed?_ Had to have been before...well, just before. So there was no sense in letting himself get distracted now.

"What the hell did you think you were doing, anyway?" And so much for not getting distracted. _Roxas,_ he reminded himself doggedly. _C'mon,_ get _it memorized._

Riku shrugged. "That I needed more power. I wasn't strong enough on my own. Well," he amended with another humorless snort as Axel hid a flinch he hadn't felt coming. " _That's_ a lie. It's my light that wasn't strong enough. My darkness did just fine," he said with an ugly twist of his mouth. "It just...had a few side effects I wasn't counting on."

" _Did_ you bring him back?" Axel asked, forcing his jaw to unclench. So Riku didn't need him. He'd heard that tune before, but just look at the kid now.

"Roxas?" Riku asked, tensing warily as they got down to brass tacks.

Axel's mouth opened and noises came out, but for some reason they sounded like: "Ansem" instead of "Who do you think?"

Riku looked as startled as he felt, which was some consolation.

"No," Riku replied, relaxing minutely; Axel was sure it was just confusion. "I thought at first that I had, but...he's the shape I gave my darkness, so when I gave in to my darkness, I...."

"Took its shape."

Riku's laugh was unsettled, but that weird thread of genuine humor Axel had noticed from time to time was definitely back. "If I'd known magic was going to be so weird," Riku huffed, "I'd have stayed at home."

"Really?"

Another snort, deeply ironic. "No."

Fuck. Now he really was getting sidetracked, bullshitting with Riku like they were a team. The funny thing was, Axel had known plenty of Fighters-in-training who'd been scared shitless to finally meet their Sacrifices, but he'd never been one of them, even knowing he was one half of Luckless. Now he figured he'd just lacked imagination for once in his life, because he hadn't thought the bond would fuck with his head like this, make him forget what was really important.

It took a wrenching effort, but he smoothed away the smirk from his face, focused on how satisfying it was to watch Riku sober too, and said, "Roxas."

"You didn't think I lost," Riku said coolly, "did you?"

His chakrams were flying before he could second-guess himself, and thank Surt for that, because for one stupid moment, there was a flutter of horror chilling the pit of his stomach until he swallowed it down. Riku had already brought up that creepy sword of his anyway, deflecting the attack with even more strength than he'd had before, and Axel had no way of telling whether that was down to Riku's new body or because he wasn't keeping his darkness in check anymore. And honestly, that sort of worried him--with no training and just his baby darkness to draw on, Riku had been thrown across half a universe, already possessed, and had come up swinging--but now wasn't the time to think about that.

Riku didn't exactly hesitate, but the flat look he gave Axel asked if he really wanted to do this.

As it happened, he did.

It was weird to fight with weapons instead of words with the proximity of his own Sacrifice making his bones hum in sympathy, to watch concrete splinter and bricks crumble to powder and know the damage wouldn't disappear the moment a battle sphere dropped. It wasn't like they could help it; neither one of them was holding back, which made property damage inevitable. When Riku hit, he hit hard, and though Axel blocked every blow, he felt it up to his shoulders each time, bones singing. Whatever advantage of reach and height he'd had before, it was gone now, but Riku wasn't half as familiar with that sort of body, or even with fighting on even ground. It tripped him up, and Axel went for the kill every time he saw an opening.

Only maybe that got to be a little predictable, because the next thing he knew, he was on his knees, Riku's blade resting void-cold and _hungry_ at his throat, giving off the unmistakable vibe of a very angry dog on a very flimsy leash.

Soul Eater. Right. Just his luck that the name was more accurate than evocative.

Panting hard as he tried to get his breath back, Axel leaned on one fist and dropped his head, stomach curdling with dread. "Well?" he snapped. As breathless as he was, it lacked a little something. "You going to kill me, or are you going to start ordering me around?" It was what he'd do. _Stay away from Roxas. Better yet, go assassinate the Superior. Sure, he'll tear you in half, but them's the breaks. Do your best!_

He wasn't expecting the sword to lift, for Riku to step away.

"Neither."

Riku was gone before Axel could turn, his dry voice rattling around in Axel's tired brain. "What?" he yelled to the empty courtyard, though he could feel that Riku was already half a planet away, maybe more. "Don't like doing things the easy way?"

Riku wasn't stupid, though, and there had to be a reason why he'd let Axel go. Something he needed Axel alive for that it wouldn't take orders to achieve. That orders might actually hinder.

One guess as to what that was.

"Sora," he groaned, dropping his head again and digging the heel of a hand into his aching brow. If Roxas disappeared back into Sora, that didn't mean he couldn't still be fished out again. It just meant Sora would have to stay alive long enough for Axel to do it--and _that_ would mean working against everything the Organization stood for.

The Superior could smell a compulsion from a mile away, but a willing betrayal? Not even Saïx could sniff that out.

"Smart," he admitted on a harsh sigh, shoulders slumping, feeling every inch his Name.

He should have known better than to play death chicken with someone willing to give up heart, body and soul for his friend. He just kept forgetting how much he and his Sacrifice had in common.

***

When he caught up with Roxas at last, Roxas didn't remember him. Stared at him like a stranger, in fact, and there just wasn't time to talk him around. Not when the Superior had already declared Roxas an enemy, and Axel was on really shaky ground himself, and he just--

He may have gone a little bit...crazy.

That didn't make getting his ass kicked by his best friend hurt any less.

He picked himself up eventually and didn't ask whether he'd have stood a better chance at winning with a Sacrifice at his side. He definitely wasn't expecting a sympathy visit, not when he could feel the exact moment when his 'one more try' became 'too fucking late.'

He would have sworn there wasn't a sentimental bone in Riku's body, but he could recognize pure joy when it came streaking across their bond like a solar flare. It made his stomach lurch and try to curl in on itself, left him shaking in the corner of a forgotten alley, because that was Roxas disappearing, maybe for good, but for just that moment, he felt human. He _felt._ And he never wanted it to end.

He was past the dry heaves when he realized he wasn't alone. Small mercies, he supposed. "Moron," Riku informed him without heat, dragging him up by main force and sitting him down on a mostly-clean crate. Still battered from his fight with Roxas, sick at himself and in no mood to hear Riku gloat, he still didn't struggle too hard when Riku tipped his head back, pulled his jaw down, and then tried to drown him with a Hi-Potion.

He did come up sputtering, which didn't amuse Riku at all; even altered, he looked like a disgruntled cat as he lifted an arm to wipe at his face.

" _Thank_ you," Riku bitched, watching disdainfully as Axel coughed his next few breaths.

"My--ha--my pleasure," Axel managed, inhaling deeply and holding it. His lungs itched, but when he let out a final cough, the fit had passed.

Riku was still staring.

"What?" If this was where the mockery started--

"Do you seriously not carry potions or something?" Riku asked abruptly, like he'd been about to say something else before the question just burst out of him.

"It's usually not a problem." It really, really wasn't. Only somehow where Riku was concerned, he always seemed to be at a disadvantage.

Riku studied him for a moment then shook his head. "Whatever. Look. You need to watch out for DiZ."

"The old guy?" Axel asked, startled. Not that he was certain about the 'old' part; it was kind of hard to tell behind the _insanely creepy_ red leather mask. Still, that could have been an order, he realized belatedly, only the push behind the words just wasn't there. "Watch out for him how?"

"He's got no use for Nobodies," Riku said flatly, "and he wants revenge on Organization XIII. That kind of 'watch out for him.' And you might want to keep in mind that he's lived this long for a reason."

"Why are you telling me this?"

The smirk was back, and how sad was it that it made him feel like he was on firmer ground, like this was the Riku he knew? "You've got something you want to do," Riku replied with a coy head-tilt that frankly looked disturbing coming from a six-foot Heartless. "Don't you?"

"You're confusing," Axel muttered, slumping back against the wall. He wanted to strangle the part of him that ordinarily would have liked that about Riku.

"I've embraced my darkness," Riku said wryly, like he'd already gotten the lecture or seen it delivered. He'd already stepped back, though, like the moment Axel gave in on any point, he stopped being interesting. "I'd better get back," he said, and Axel felt something ugly twist in his gut.

"Looking forward to your reunion with Sora?" he asked, waiting for Riku to flare right back at him. If he wanted a fight, that was fine by Axel. Funnily enough, he happened to be good at it.

Riku froze, and though he collected himself so smoothly Axel almost thought he'd imagined it, he knew he hadn't. Not with Riku's eyes staring dead into his own.

"Looking like this?" Riku said calmly. "I don't think so. DiZ still has Naminé," he explained with a shrug. "I'm not leaving her there."

"Naminé?" He'd totally forgotten about her: Kairi's Nobody, and Kairi was...important to Sora. He wondered if Riku knew he was helping the competition, because any idiot could see Riku hadn't just wanted a Fighter in Sora.

It was almost hilarious when Riku narrowed his eyes in warning, bristling nearly as automatically as he did over Sora. "Am I seriously going to have to fight you over her too?"

"Hey, do I _look_ like your replica?" Axel protested, lifting his hands. It actually mollified Riku rather than setting him off, which made fuck-all sense, except--Riku really was helping the competition. And either he didn't realize it or he just didn't care. Like he had a cast-iron pair of Sora-shaped blinkers on, or like his darkness and his light had gotten their wires crossed and left him with all of the obsession and none of watch-you-while-you-sleep, kill-your-girlfriends kind of madness that had made Sephiroth a household name. Like Sora was the only thing in Riku's world.

He may have hated Sora a little just then. He would have _killed_ to have Roxas feel the same.

"Our Name is showing," he said with a snort. That won him approximately half a smile before Riku threw open a dark portal, off to save the fair damsel, and when had the world gotten so weird? Riku wasn't supposed to be the hero. He guessed that was just the fallout when Sora decided to lay down on the job.

Something came sailing out of the dark portal just before it closed, and Axel caught it on reflex before it could bean him in the head.

Hi-Potion. It figured.

"Smartass."

He blamed his later decision to kidnap Kairi on temporary insanity, but what the hell. If happily ever after wasn't in his cards, then he wasn't going to be the only one out of luck, even if it meant Riku was going to kick his ass. And Riku was _definitely_ going to kick his ass.

He told himself he wasn't looking forward to it, but he was. He _really_ was. Not because he was spoiling for a fight or because he wanted his Sacrifice around, but because having Riku's heart near enough to bleed through into him was the closest thing he had to having one of his own.

***

He'd been expecting it. He'd even admit that he'd assumed Kairi herself would be the mitigating factor; a Princess of Heart wasn't going to let even a toweringly pissed Riku just go and murder a guy right in front of her. Too bad he didn't _have_ Kairi anymore; it made it all the more awkward when Riku slammed into him out of nowhere, so fast he had to have portaled in and attacked within instants, because Axel didn't even feel the hopeful pull of their idiot bond until Riku was already on him.

He went down hard--big surprise--grateful they were in one of Radiant Garden's actual gardens instead of the surrounding barrens. At least it gave him a soft place to land.

Riku was sitting on him again by the time he caught his breath, and Axel had just opened his mouth to ask for the dinner and movie first after all when Riku growled at him. _Growled._ Like maybe the Heartless thing wasn't just skin deep.

"Where's Kairi?" was the first thing out of his mouth.

Axel had to resist the urge to beat his own head into the ground. _Where's Kairi? Where's Sora?_ "Don't you have hobbies?" he accused.

"Where," Riku snarled, laying his sword across Axel's neck again, "is she?"

Axel smiled, tight and poisonous, and said, "Ask me properly."

Gold eyes narrowed, and though Riku's jaw worked for a moment, eventually he ground out, "Please."

Axel laughed, harsh and disbelieving, and--was he serious? "Do you seriously not get it? Is it--do you think I haven't gotten the _hint?_ But see, this is the part where you're supposed to say 'Tell me where she is, Axel,' and _I'm_ supposed to--"

"No," Riku said flatly, cutting him off so fast Axel's teeth clicked sharply together. It was almost an order, that 'no,' only Riku never, ever crossed that line. Backed off fast every time it even looked close to happening. Axel just wanted to know one thing.

"Why not?"

"Because I know what it's like," Riku shot back through gritted teeth, trembling on the edge of violence though his sword arm remained steady. "I know exactly what it's like to not be able to say no. Why the _fuck_ do you think I'd do that to another person?"

He hadn't even realized he'd been straining against Riku's hold until the fight drained right out of him, his nearly-free arm going slack under Riku's grip on his wrist. Instantly--predictably--Riku scrambled off him, stumbling away a wary few steps and breathing hard. He looked like Axel had gutted him, and Axel just...couldn't.

"Saïx," he said, sitting up slowly on his elbows and feeling a million years old. "Saïx has her."

Riku was gone almost before he finished speaking, but it took a long time to work up the will to move.

Of course Riku wasn't interested in ordering him around. Axel had only been staring into the very face of _why_ for most of the time they'd known each other.

"He called me a person," he muttered to nothing and no one, which was a little too ironic for even him to appreciate.

So. Riku didn't want a Fighter, only maybe that wasn't exactly true. What Riku wanted was someone who didn't give a fuck for orders, who followed his own heart even when it stopped making sense entirely--even when he'd already lost it and getting what he wanted might just mean never, ever getting his heart back again. Roxas wasn't Sora. But neither was Sora without Roxas.

Digging the heels of both hands into his tight-shut eyes, Axel told himself firmly to _think._ Forget his Sacrifice and all their issues, which could probably exert their own gravitational pull if they were ever combined. What did _he_ want to do?

Huffing a laugh, Axel shook his head. "Well, that was easy," he sighed, threading shaking hands through his hair. He'd sort of assumed that he and Riku would just keep picking at each other forever, like a scab neither one of them wanted to let heal; he kept forgetting that things could always, always get worse.

And that Riku was fucking distracting, because here he was getting sidetracked again.

He'd been looking out for Roxas too long to stop now, so that was just what he was going to do...whatever form Roxas came in. If Riku had a problem with that, they'd just have to brawl it out like always. Axel wasn't worried about losing. He had a goal. Hell, he had two.

The only other thing he _really_ wanted to do was make Xehanort pay. Too bad he'd have to settle for Xehanort's Nobody.

***

_Don't stop moving,_ he'd told Sora, and that was really excellent advice. So was _Don't ask_ and _Get going._ Too bad he he'd never been all that great at following his own suggestions.

It was funny. He'd half-expected to--he'd wanted to--but he couldn't quite see Roxas when he looked at Sora. Maybe it was the hair, which was floppier than anything that spiky had any right to be, or maybe it was because Sora had clearly been taking fashion tips from his two sidekicks: all primary colors and his older brother's shoes. Mostly he figured it was the eyes, because they might be the same color, but the way they looked at the world was just...different. Sora's could be fierce, but then they always looked sad. 'Fierce' was just the way Roxas looked at everything. Maybe he'd known all along his time was limited, that he had to devour everything he saw before it was gone.

There were too many Dusks between them and anything like safety, too many for four guys to handle on their own, but Axel stomped down hard on the part of him that wondered where his Sacrifice was right now. He knew exactly where Riku was, as it happened: going after Kairi, which was half the reason he'd pointed Sora in that direction in the first place.

That, he reflected ruefully as he ducked the sweep of another Dusk's claws, and Riku's obsessions were fucking _contagious._ He'd had some half-assed notion of using Kairi as leverage against Naminé, maybe against Sora himself, to get Roxas back. And yeah, _that_ plan had lasted, hadn't it? She was a Princess of Heart, and he didn't have one; he should have been immune.

He was totally blaming Riku for the fact that he still wanted to apologize.

"I think I liked it better when they were on my side," he muttered, taking advantage of a brief lull in the fighting to catch his breath.

"Feeling a little...regret?" Sora asked at his back, which could have been cruel--what exactly did he have to feel with, anyway?--but this was Sora. The little jerk was teasing him, probably looking over his shoulder with that patient smile that said he'd known Axel would see things his way eventually. Always had to see the best in people: that was Sora.

"Nah," Axel said, feeling everything inside him go still and certain. "I can handle these punks." Of course he could. "Watch this!"

He just had to give it his all.

He knew he'd confused Riku, not healing himself after that fight in the digital Twilight Town, but the truth was, neither the Light nor the Dark had much interest in him now. Healing spells worked badly for him if they bothered to work at all. Fire, though--Fire loved him. Always had, always would.

Nobody or not, the feeling was entirely mutual.

He pulled every scrap of magic he had, found it wanting and reached deeper--heated the air in his lungs, his flesh, his bones, drew on every flickering spark he could find. Fire sang through him, filling his head with a comforting, low growl, and he cast his flames wide, wider. How had there gotten to be so many Dusks?

Wider still.

He needed more fuel, more power. Reached. Touched his Sacrifice, who flinched, focused on him with a horror Axel would never have expected--and reached back. Offering his hand and all his strength behind it.

Axel laughed. So that was why Riku had shut him out that one time. No sense dragging anyone else down with you when you knew you were being a moron.

He let the Fire rise up between them and turned to the last fuel he had left: his life, maybe his soul, whatever had held mind and body together all this time without a heart to glue the seams. It hollowed him out in an instant, something the opposite of pressure building as the very walls of his being crumbled and streamed away. He no longer sent the fire; he was the fire, swallowing rank upon rank of Dusks and hungrily tearing them apart, snapping after every particle as they dissolved until there was nothing left.

It was a surprise to blink up at the non-color sky of a stillborn world and realize he still had a body, such as it was. His thoughts were still spread out over a square mile, the fingers he tried to twitch swirling dust motes to eddies thirty paces away. He could feel the slick, flat ground beneath his sprawled limbs, but he couldn't work his legs. He managed to roll his head...and there was Sora, dropping down beside him with such a tragic expression, Axel almost wanted to laugh. Would Roxas have given him that look, with so much heart behind it? Maybe. He'd like to think so.

"You're...fading away...."

But Roxas wouldn't have let him go without a fight.

"Well, that's what happens when you put your whole being into an attack," he managed, trying to head that dumb heroic impulse off before Sora could get started. He'd managed half his goals, and Sora would take care of the other one for him if Riku didn't beat Sora to it. "You know what I mean? Not that Nobodies actually _have_ beings...right?" Sora looked like he wanted to argue, which would have been hilarious if he'd had time to appreciate the flailing sure to follow. "Anyway, I digress. Go," he said, "find Kairi." Sora and Riku really did deserve one another. Too bad Riku's luck ran the same as his. "Oh." Damn it. "Almost forgot." Stupid Riku. "Sorry for what I did to her."

Stupid _fucking_ Riku and his Dark-spawned, Light-fueled obsessions. He really ought to give the little shit a piece of his mind.

"When we find her, you can tell her that yourself," Sora insisted. Axel could tell he didn't believe it; there were too many pieces of Axel flaking away, steaming up into the air in a cloud of shadows.

"Think I'll pass," he murmured. "My heart just wouldn't be in it, you know?"

Dying wasn't so bad. It didn't even hurt. He just kept spiraling out into the dark, a flicker of poorly-connected fragments dragging thought and memory in tow. The threads holding him together would snap eventually, and then he'd just be...snuffed out. He sort of liked that idea.

Only...maybe it wasn't his imagination that he seemed to be picking up speed, not drifting any longer but pulled along by a current he couldn't fight. Alone in the sightless dark, he had no landmarks to steer by, only a growing certainty that he was heading _to_ someplace. He hadn't figured there'd be any sort of afterlife waiting for someone like him, but there was a purposefulness to the force that held him that he couldn't ignore. Already his scattered sense of self was knitting together, gathered up and kneaded into shape by the vast, cold hands of the Dark, and that was his first clue that his luck was running just about average.

When the Dark turned him loose, he fell into the shadowed well of Riku's heart like a meteor coming to earth, screaming and spitting and just waiting to explode. It sent Riku to his knees, right there on the lip of an abandoned rooftop in the very center of Organization territory, which meant the first few blistering imprecations Axel hurled at him went completely unnoticed.

"Shut up," Riku muttered after a moment, pressing the heel of one hand hard against his breastbone as he panted for breath. "Not my fault you've got a stupid idea of where to put things."

_What the fuck are you talking about?_

"I don't know, _Kairi,"_ Riku shot back. He sounded vaguely pissed, only Axel could _feel_ his amusement--sardonic, because this was Riku, but unmistakable. "Where did you think your heart was going to end up when it burned a hole in the Heartless that took it?"

_What?_

He could feel it, though, cradled in the deepest part of Riku's own, caught flashes of memory that both were and weren't his when he touched it: that last day when everything went wrong, the experiment spinning out of control, when he'd been overwhelmed and torn loose from the oldest anchor he'd known. So he'd turned to the others: the Fire, his Sacrifice, the one searing a path straight to the other.

"Took me a while to figure it out," Riku admitted, pushing himself unsteadily to his feet. "Probably should have realized when my first real spell was a Dark _Firaga."_

_You're shitting me._

"'Fraid not. So you might be stuck with me for a while," Riku said, and Axel could sense the effort he was making not to feel anything about that at all. "Because I have no idea how to get you out of there."

Worry. Resignation. The echoes of a furious hopelessness and a very real desire to kick Axel's ass. Embarrassment.

A quiet sense of peace Riku was trying ruthlessly to stomp flat, because they hated each other; they'd been enemies from the first, and Riku shouldn't feel so relieved to have him so close.

_Worry about it later,_ Axel suggested, pretending he hadn't noticed a thing. Which wasn't like him--talk about blackmail material--only kicking Riku when they were both technically down just didn't have the appeal it once had. _We've got more important things to worry about. Where_ is _Kairi, by the way? I'd have thought you'd have her by now._

"Naminé went after her," Riku said distractedly, stepping up to the roof ledge again and casting about like he could--fuck, he _could_ smell where Kairi was. Even Axel could through Riku's senses: something brassy like summer-warmed glass, only to Riku it smelled like sun-glare on waves. "So I guess we'd better catch up."

He could feel Riku's worry, but it wasn't just for Kairi. He worried for Naminé too, but not because she was a piece of Kairi gone rogue. She was just a friend.

_I am a fucking moron,_ Axel muttered to himself, and he knew Riku had caught that; Riku just didn't ask.

He should have remembered Riku was carrying around a Keyblade of his own these days and thought about what that meant, why he and Sora--and fine, Kairi too--had never once treated him like a monster. Not that he'd known at the time, but maybe--maybe when he'd first woke up without his heart, if he'd taken a chance and slipped away from the others, gone looking for his Sacrifice instead of assuming that door had shut and locked behind him--maybe he could have beaten the odds. Found Destiny Island before Xehanort's Heartless did. Changed everything. He'd only needed to be fast, and very, very lucky.

It was a nice dream, anyway.

"Come on," Riku said, like Axel really had a choice, resolutely not thinking of might-have-beens.

At least one of them was immune to distractions.

***

Dusks again. _Why is it always Dusks?_ Axel bitched, not really expecting an answer, but if you couldn't bitch at the end of all things, then you just weren't trying.

The laughter Riku was bottling up inside was near-hysterical, but worse, it was tired. Xemnas hadn't been a pushover--and he owed Riku for that, for helping him make good on that final promise to himself--but it was more than that. It was this place, a void without a door, and never mind that it was more brightly-lit; Riku had been trapped on the wrong side of the realm of Light once before, and some part of him was terrified of having to do it again.

"No problem," Sora muttered at their back, exhausted but determined. "They can't be worse than Xem--Xeh-er, _that_ guy, right?"

_I think I'm gonna choke on a rainbow,_ Axel moaned in horrified fascination. How could anyone be that optimistic and not dissolve in a pile of kittens?

Another bubble of desperate amusement from Riku tickled him as it rose, but Riku only had eyes for the army surrounding them. There had to be thousands, and they were all just small fry, but one hit at the wrong time might be all it took. A stray memory of an inverted world rocked him--black cave-like sky, twisted growths that might have been trees, colossi with yellow eyes rearing up to tower over a dead-black army--and then it was gone. Riku's fear went with it.

That shouldn't have left him near-shitting himself with terror, but score one for instinct.

_No,_ he insisted doggedly, scrambling wildly for alternatives when he barely had a clue what Riku had just resolved on. _Whatever idiot scheme you just thought up, the answer is no. You can--look, I'm in your heart, right? Have you tried summoning me? One more ally--I could make a difference, okay? Just--_

When he felt Riku drawing on every scrap of power he had left, he knew exactly what the idiot meant to do.

_Oh, no. Nonono, you can't--did you forget that_ killed _me? Okay, sure, you still have a heart, but--_

Riku wasn't listening.

_**Do you really think Sora wants to face your Nobody?!** _

He almost had him. He could feel Riku wavering, not wanting to think about that, about what might happen if he really did burn out his own heart to fuel one final attack. It might only kill him--as if that wasn't bad enough--but if there was even the slightest risk--

Then the first wave of Dusks were on them, and Axel knew he'd been too late.

_Don't do this,_ Axel pleaded as Riku stubbornly hoarded what power he could spare, attacking furiously because he wasn't counting on strength alone to tip the scales for long. _Look. Burn_ my _heart. It's your best shot, and what the hell am I going to use it for? You can't stick me back in a body that doesn't exist. But I can still do this._

Riku's shock had been growing by the word, and Axel had to wonder if he just hadn't thought it through before now: that if Riku went, Axel was going down with him. He didn't think Riku would be quite so eager to put his suggestion into practice, though, and he cringed despite himself when Riku's heart caught his by the scruff in a grip that was terrifyingly strong.

"Axel," Riku gritted out between sweeping thrusts, breathless but determined. "You're coming back."

_Riku--_

"The darkness has your body," Riku interrupted impatiently, plowing through a half-dozen Dusks with a snarl that made two dozen more dance warily out of reach. "It keeps _everything_ the Heartless give it, and you're _my_ Fighter, and you're _coming back._ That's an _order."_

Gods, he felt that one, right to the core of him. It snatched him up and tumbled him every which way, like he was flying--

Like Riku had teased his heart free and flung him clear, as hard as he could.

_You stubborn sonofabitch!_ Axel roared, but there was no one to hear him, only the echoing dark that closed around him and drew him in.

Oh, it was interested in him _now,_ all right, examining him with curious fingers until it found that ragged bond Axel had been trying his damnedest to give up on. Only it wasn't so ragged anymore. He could rope a Behemoth with the invisible chain spiraling out between him and his Sacrifice, and from the way the Dark purred when it touched it, he could leash something stronger than that by far.

There had to be a catch. There was no way he could luck into something like this, not him.

**m i r r o r ,** a cool, dusty voice crooned at him from nowhere, carrying with it the dry smell of feathers and old leaves.

_Broken,_ Axel countered, but the Dark laughed at him. Which wasn't disturbing at all.

**m i r r o r ,** it insisted, and he could almost grasp what it was trying to say: that superstition had nothing to do with them, and they'd been blind all along. It wasn't luck that had cracked them in two, and together they weren't even broken.

_I've got orders,_ he mentioned experimentally, trying to ignore the stupid thrill of satisfaction that warmed the pit of his imaginary stomach. _And watch the hands!_ he yelped at the Dark's low chuckle, its slithering, half-paternal caress and the sense that he was being just _precious._

If he had to be at the mercy of an elemental force personified, half of him really wished it could have been Fire. On the other hand, he guessed the flip side of all his lovely glare and heat was the very thing he'd been entrusted to, in ways even Water couldn't match.

Luckily for him, the Dark liked his Sacrifice. It'd take him where he needed to go.

After that, he was on his own.

***

Riku was really sort of tired of fighting Xehanorts. It wouldn't be so bad if they didn't come in all shapes and sizes, and as soon as one was cut down, it was just a matter of time before an earlier model showed up, older and stronger and trickier. There was probably a Prehistoric Xehanort waiting somewhere in the wings, who would die with an evil laugh foretelling the coming of Xehanort From Before the Dawn of Time, and by the time Eldritch Horror Xehanort showed up, Riku vowed he'd stop being surprised.

In fact, he'd been getting a little peeved that nobody _anywhere_ ever stayed dead for good, but just this once, he figured he could overlook it.

"What took you so long?" he asked as another defender settled in on his left: just a little too tall, limbs a little too long, so it was easy to miss just how solidly he was built. He was still wearing black, which didn't help with the impression of being something not quite human, but it made the red flag of his hair stand out all the more, and Riku could _feel_ just how human he was.

"Hey, saving Sora's ass is a full-time job," Axel drawled, flames filling his palms as the vast line of Heartless arrayed on the outskirts of Paris began to advance as one, the latest Xehanort clone standing back and watching them go. " _You_ ought to know."

"Tell me about it," Riku muttered. He shouldn't want to grin like he did. For all he knew, Axel still had plans to try to pull Roxas out of Sora. That he'd followed the one order Riku felt he had a right to give didn't mean that anything had changed...only he hadn't told Axel to come back to _him._ Axel had decided that on his own.

"Maybe later," Axel said with a grin. "Looks like we're going to be busy for a while."

"Just a bit." It was stupid to feel like everything was finally _right_ for a change; his luck was never that good.

"Hey."

When he glanced over and up, he found Axel watching him, not the Heartless, eyes bright with mischief and something almost fond. He'd never seen Axel look like that, like he had a secret that was also a joke and couldn't wait to spring it, but his face looked like it'd been made for it. Knocked momentarily speechless, Riku arched a brow and watched Axel's sly little grin stretch wide.

"Want to declare a spell battle?" Axel asked, ducking down to stage-murmur the invitation in his ear.

Riku laughed, feeling the weight of at least two worlds drop from his shoulders.

"I thought you'd never ask."


End file.
